TIRED!

The body was created to work and to rest at the appropriate time. The holy scripture says God even rested on the 7th day after creating the world.

The same thing applies to the mind! How can we rest our minds? I feel it is simple. STOP THINKING...

Now this may sound contradictory to statements like 'the moment you stop thinking you die', ' think big' 'think'! By all means please do the thinking where necessary but also know when to allow the mind to rest. As I have always believed 'there is a time for everything', the trouble is knowing what time it is and finding a balance. Don't go crazy as one of the pictures portray STOP THINKING! Take time out to rest, that way you become a pleasant person to be around your loved ones, friends and families.

STOP THINKING, start doing! And the first thing I advocate for you to do right now is that you rest....

Go on!

Internal madness

Life is beautiful yet some see ugliness and ensure that others around them feel the bitterness they feel while justifying their actions under religious or political reasons. It is plain stupidity and foolishness and only one person would judge accordingly on the last day.

Why make other people's life miserable when you have nothing good to offer. Deal with the hurt you feel inside of you and know that there is nothing really special about you, your views or your thoughts guess why? Cos we all are special in the sight of God. As long as you have life inside of you there is something special about you so appreciate the uniqueness of others and deal with the madness inside of you cos everyone has a little bit of madness inside of them yet they deal with it so why should the whole world stop cos of your own internal madness!!! Please deal with yourself...if you think you are all that and a bag of chips, know that there are others who are twice and even 10 times more than you and yet they still have a humane approach to life so what's so special about you???

If you can't affect life positively then you might as well leave this world so the rest can live in peace for we really can do without you!

Sellah!
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

CHRISTMAS AGAIN!!!

Ok, yeah! Its christmas time and all around you I am certain you can see a lot of shopping going on, presents being passed round, music in the air, decorative lights and all sorts! WOW! I can only imagine the sight ....

Just a short message from me to you. Try to think of others this time around. Don't be selfish, go out of your way for others and all in all show love! that is the greatest gift of all. In fact show love to someone that doesn't deserve your love for that truly is what the saviour Jesus Christ did for us all.

Merry Christmas everyone and please please please DO HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

R.I.P

I lost an old class mate today. SAD! Just occurring to me that I had been meaning to get in touch with her and see if she finally got round starting her doctorate degree as she told me the last time we spoke. TOO LATE! And my heart is heavy. Question is were we close friends? NO but we were cordial.

Why am I sad? Its because no matter how we think we are deep down, no person SHOULD be ok with the news of the death of someone they once knew or someone they've come in contact with. This is because life is precious and the news of one's death reminds you of the inevitable. It makes you sit up and ask yourself certain questions. It makes you cherish the moments you have with your friends, loved ones, colleagues and family members knowing that NOW is the time to show your love and appreciation for them NOT LATER! NOW
So call that friend, that family member, that boss, that subordinate, that loved one and appreciate them for who they are. It is always easy to get carried away by the hassles of life but remember people around you are extremely important so be there for them, show love, encourage others when you have the chance, challenge them to be better than what they are, forgive when they wrong you and LOVE as often as possible. Its easier said than done but 'you get a pass mark for trying' ...says my husband
THIS IS FOR YOU YASMIN EL'RUFAI. I WILL REMEMBER YOU AS YOU WERE ...LOVELY! Rest in peace. Rest in peace yasmin

BEEN A WHILE

Its been over a month now that I've published anything on this blog.   My sincere apologies for those enthusiastic fans of mine.  A lot has happened and soon I will share with you.  Remember...there is always a better way!

From riversongs titled pretty angel

You are both being and becoming at the same time. A portion of your reality is not merely what is, it includes what you imagine that your life can be.
The stronger your desire for what can be, the more you are motivated to change. The more you perceive that what you desire is possible, the more choices you make in favor of that envisioned future. When that vision is compelling, it pulls your tomorrow into your today.

Prepare, Posture, Position, Arise, & Be Wise!
Jon
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Time- life. Seed-harvest

It is important that you realize time waits for no one. If you do not do what you ought to

do at a given time or should I say if you do not seize the opportunity when given then do not be alarmed at the outcome in the future.

I am saying this because more than ever before I have come to the conclusion that whatever you sow you will surely reap. Let's come down to earth.... How can you say you are looking to be financially free yet you have nothing doing with your hands. How can you say you want to be productive yet you've never for one day sat down to plan and write out a vision to run with. At what point would financial freedom or productivity set in? I find that most times we are mentally lazy and easy to settle for a mediocre life style

Nowadays we see people who do not know what it means to be a friend, what it means to care for someone, what it means to intercede for a loved one. People no longer go out of their way for others, some do not value other people's act of kindness, some stay financially indebted to others even though they are capable of servicing the debt instead they risk loosing a good relationship which was once founded on trust. Time waits for no one, eventually your investments good or bad would come to maturity so do not be alarmed when responses become cold, when that friend takes you only on face value, when your words can't be taken to the bank, or when others do not see the need in going out of their way for you. There is no other way to say this, time waits for no man if so invest wisely that you may presently see what your harvest would look like in the future.

Now please do me a favor....look around you. Yes do so now. Who do you see? Your boss, colleague, friend, wife , child, husband, mother, father, sibling, employee, employer?
....A time would come when they would not be there...ask yourself if you've invested rightly in their lives. What are you presently doing or not doing? Are you taking them for granted or are you taking advantage of their gentle disposition or simple nature. Know that there are principles or laws that play a vital part in life irrespective of whom you are dealing with and those laws stand supreme. Clearly such a law is that of seed time and harvest.

........there is always a better way!

Walls have ears.
Trust is earned and respect too
You may deserve to have something but not everything is expedient.
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

A heart felt SMS to a couple expecting a baby.....

Am sure by now you guys are counting days. Am so happy for you both .
Please try and be there for eachother as often as possible. With a child coming in, it's not a matter of who is right or wrong it's a matter of working hand in hand for the good of your child. You guys are a team. In all you do know that your life is about to change but don't fret.
Please always talk to eachother. Whenever you feel neglected communicate this to one another. Don't let yourself go. Be there for yourselves.A Couple's Guide to Communication

Where to ?

Be careful how you treat others. It's a matter of time and soon they will eventually be in a position you never envisaged.

You are one with your words so endeavor to weight your conversation before speaking. Often I play( in my head )possible ways a conversation would go before I start what I can't finish. Try it !

Never think you know it all. You can learn even from a new born babe. My daughter is presently teaching me how to be a mother. Certainly I'll be better when her other siblings come along. Take the hint! You can learn from a cow too!

'Go where you are celebrated'... so my husband says to me. Listen to me people gravitate towards warmth and affection so learn to celebrate people irrespective of their class in society maybe that way you 'll make friends or better still loyalists.

Only a fool refuses corrections. If you are corrected (never always pleasant and may hurt our pride or ego ) thank heavens for the opportunity eventually the fool gets caught in his web. You for one would have saved yourself.
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Breathe.......

Consider breathing for once.
Consider breathing to calm yourself
Just breathe.
I said breathe, it does work!


When you breathe you concentrate on your thoughts
That is why when you breathe you don't talk
When you are not talking I do hope you are thinking
And while thinking I do hope your eyes are opened to make observations
In observing we read body language...emmm I hope you 've not stopped thinking.

You see, if you talk as much try cutting down what you say and think twice as much as you talked....
Did it work?
Were you able to achieve more?
Often times our expression alone speaks louder than we can ever say
Eventually the message is passed across without the damaging effect of the tongue


Now don't get me wrong, there is a time for everything.
The trick is to know when to talk and to know when to breathe.
Choose wisely......


..there is always a better way

what if ?

If we only take a moment to be quiet and observe the things around us.

If we only decide not to complain but learn from every given situation.

If we only understand everyone has their opinion and would like it to be appreciated.

if only we maintain a good attitude towards life we will eventually see the positive and not the negative each time we look into the mirror.

If we only say 'am sorry', 'I love you deeply','thank you', 'forgive me'. 'Please' the response we receive may be different.

WHAT IF?
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Dozzzzzzzzzinggg off

I have always been one to think all sorts. One of my favorite moments when I was much younger were my afternoon naps where I would go into dream world and dream. I loved it because I was usually aware of my environment and so wasn't totally deep in sleep when I would decide on what to dream about. I loved it because I was in control of all the actors in my dream. I could decide on the scenarios, delete any part I wanted, kill any actor!, kiss any celebrity(emmm yaaa!), become friends with presidents and in return be rewarded with a ministerial position(yipee!)... This would play until I fell deep into sleep. What a beautiful thing.

I would wake each time feeling sad because I would wish and wish all this were true. For me those times were my "escape from reality" moments. Whenever I wanted to be happy I would sleep and dream it!..I mean can you imagine that? Whenever I felt let down or discouraged..SLEEP. When someone upset me depending on my level of anger I would either make peace or beat the person to my satisfaction...WHERE?...yes in my SLEEP..lol. Well, gone are those days. Although it has it's advantages, let's see one disadvantage.

You can't wish anything to being. It's like window shopping; creating an appetite but not having what you see as yours. Wishing has its place. I guess when we wish for things it shows we can see a different side of a coin and want it to be ours assuming what we see is positive.

But don't stop there! Do you realize you can actually get what you want! Now am not talking about kissing denzel Washington or Eva Longoria cos they are both married among other reasons, am also not talking of killing someone to satisfy your thirst for vengeance cos you will go to jail or face capital punishment. I am talking of going out of your comfort zone and passivity to get what you want.

Do you want a better relationship with your loved ones? To be respected by others? To be more thoughtful and caring to others? To stop bad habits that has eaten into the happiness of your home and life? Do you want to be better at communicating? To constructively correct and not criticize those you have authority over?To watch your eating habits cos it's telling on your health?.....the list goes on. DON'T SLEEP AND IMAGINE IT ALL THEN WAKE WISHING FOR THE POSSIBILITY OF IT ACTUALLY HAPPENING. As long as beggars continue to beg and wish for things yet never get the chance to enjoy them, the same will happen to you. You will go through life never riding that horse.

Listen to me... A horse signifies strength. Only trained riders get on a horse and ride well. If you want to get on that horse you have to train yourself and training is an ACTIVE PLAY not a PASSIVE PLAY. In training ourselves we no longer need to wish instead we begin to see our dreams come to play because we have submitted ourselves to learn the ways to achieve what we dream of. Emmmmmm I didn't say it would be easy but I assure you one thing and I can bet you 100 bucks.....YOU WILL RIDE THAT HORSE!!!!!

It's not about you...it's about you :-)

'What about me' ?! ...The general thing people say or don't say but think of and act upon depending on temperament type when they clash with others .

'How come I have to be the first to make the right move'?

' I need not come across as easy'

'I need to show that am a "No nonsense kinda person" !'

hmmmm familiar? Well I had my fair share of the above and ooooh how I struggled.
Simply put , the moment you stop thinking about yourself it becomes easier to see things from the other person 's perspective.

It really isn't about you... Then again it eventually turns out to be about you when issues are resolved or not resolved. You either find yourself hurting or you find yourself at peace. Now do you see why its about YOU?

Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

HUH..?

This blog is about all forms of interactions . The focus is on encouraging a positive way of dealing with people and building a better relationship irrespective of what side of the coin you find yourself in. I have taken the liberty to categorize all discussions on this blog into three umbrella themes. 

The first is what I call the vertical interactions. To define this we can simply say it is any form of interaction between two parties where A is in a position of authority towards B. B in most cases looks up to and takes directives from A making A in most cases more powerful and in control of/responsible for B. In other words B can be seen as submissive to A.

The second is what I call the horizontal interaction. 

As the name suggests both A and B are on the same level in the sense that no one is above the other , however at any given time A can decide to take a submissive position indirectly placing B in a more superior position just for the mean time. This position is vice versa and based on mutual consent.

Yes yes yes! You are right the third category is the diagonal interaction . Without being mathematical I decided to define this kind of interaction as one that is neither vertical or horizontal but one way or the other there is an unspoken mutual understanding of both party's position and respected as such. Both parties find ways of dealing with each other when ever the need arises seeing that there isn't a direct connection as in the case of vertical and horizontal interactions. Emmm...I hope I didn't confuse you.

You can place the below interactions within the above categories. Some may fall into more than one category depending on scenarios that may presently be playing in your mind
God- human, 
Government - People, 
Leaders - Followers,
Parents- Children, 
Husband - Wife, 
Employer- Employee
Sibling- Sibling,
Friend- Friend,
in- laws- in- laws, .....the list goes on.

In a nutshell this blog is based on my thoughts, experience, mistakes, findings, observation and research availing me the knowledge to which I write.
Welcome to positive interaction where I strongly believe there is always a better way....